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Allison Larkin

Internationally Best-Selling Author

You are here: Home / sleeptalking / Sha la la la!

Sha la la la!

October 15, 2008 Filed Under: sleeptalking

On Sunday night, the hubs decided to make a pot of decaf. We were sitting at the kitchen table and it was cozy and the idea of a cup of coffee was too ideal to pass up.

“This is decaf, right?” I asked, joking.

“Ha! Would be funny if it wasn’t,” he said.

We clarified which bag the coffee came from, and it was, indeed, decaf. Unfortunately, it didn’t matter. While I was about to pass out at 7, by 10:30, I was completely wired. I sat in bed, catching up on Grey’s Anatomy episodes on my laptop. I was only going to watch one, but ended up watching 3. Then, of course, I started worrying about car accidents, cancer, and a full range of illnesses only worthy of mention in obscure medical journals and procedural TV shows.

After accidentally waking J up three or four times (he falls back to sleep so easily), I decided to hang out in the living room instead. I watched two episodes of How I Met Your Mother, and all the new episodes of The Office.

2:30 in the morning, and I still wasn’t sleepy. Argo and J were snoring in the bedroom, and the cat was giving me the evil eye from the couch. I used to love being up so late. It used to feel like quality alone time, but now it’s just lonely. I wasn’t lucid enough to get any work done, but I wasn’t sleepy enough to go to bed. Then I discovered the wonder that is classic television reruns on CBS.com. One episode of Family Ties made my eyelids heavy and my brain regress to a time where my dreams were filled with the possibility of marrying Michael J. Fox.

I managed to keep that blissful sleepy feeling as I closed up my computer and stumbled into the dark bedroom. But then I stepped on a shoe that I thought was the dog, bent down to pet him, and caught the corner of the bedframe full on my left boob, so hard that I knocked some of the wind out of myself. I spent the next 45 minutes hugging an ice pack and trying to breathe normally. I have a very odd looking bruise.

I am never drinking coffee after 4pm again. Decaf or otherwise.

5 Comments

Comments

  1. Ben says

    October 15, 2008 at 4:43 pm

    Ugh. I can’t even drink pop after dinner without spending the night like a crack junkie. That sucks. I hate not being able to fall asleep.

    Reply
  2. nancypearlwannabe says

    October 15, 2008 at 6:04 pm

    All that from some decaf coffee? I think I could drink a Big Gulp of espresso and then fall asleep, that’s how exhausted I am lately…

    Reply
  3. Melissa says

    October 17, 2008 at 1:10 pm

    I love “How I Met Your Mother.” Funniest show ever….I think.

    I haven’t been sleeping too well either lately…but that’s because of the cat.

    ~Zzzzzzz~
    Melissa

    Reply
  4. Mickey says

    October 17, 2008 at 6:49 pm

    I think decaf is a lie.

    Reply
  5. The Modern Gal says

    October 18, 2008 at 7:15 pm

    I love going back and watching the themes to 80s sitcoms. There’s something wonderful about it.

    I’m glad to know there’s another place I can waste my time now …

    Reply

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Internationally bestselling author of STAY, WHY CAN'T I BE YOU and SWIMMING FOR SUNLIGHT. THE PEOPLE WE KEEP coming from @gallerybooks on 8/3/2021

Allison Larkin
A few days ago, I took this photo of turkeys while A few days ago, I took this photo of turkeys while I was out on a run, marveling at how wild animals do not seem to mind when they see me. Once, I almost bumped into a deer, the way a couple might meet-cute in a rom com. We just didn’t see each other. I’ve always thought it was a fun little quirk. Not even bunnies are afraid of me. But this afternoon on my run, I came up over a hill and was suddenly within fifteen feet of a wild boar. Thankfully, a year or two ago I got curious about the big traps that show up trailside around the bay, looked them up and learned about how fast, ruthlessly aggressive, and unpredictable a wild boar can be. Otherwise, I might have (stupidly) thought I was in the middle of another one of my Snow White moments and been all “Hello there, Mr. Pig! Look at you!” believing that I could quietly observe in wonder. Instead, I knew this was a bad situation. The boar grunted and moved to the center of the trail. It felt very ‘You shall not pass!’ But I did not want to pass. I wanted to get away. I backed slowly for a few moments and then turned and ran faster than I ever have in my whole life. I’ve since learned that there’s no way that boar chased me, because there’s no chance of outrunning a boar (climb a tree if you can). But I know that boar saw me and also wasn’t happy about the surprise, and I had a moment, racing back over the hills I’d just run — not daring to look behind me more than once or twice in fear I’d lose my footing — when I truly did not know what would happen. I’ve been in scary situations, but they were a different kind of scary. I don’t think I’ve ever flat out run for my life before, but that’s truly what I thought I was doing. Right now I am still full of adrenaline and also exhausted and so so thankful to be okay.
My lemon is a happy fox. #fruitfaces My lemon is a happy fox. #fruitfaces
I think there’s something about getting older an I think there’s something about getting older and reaching back to the core of who you are. I’ve always been at my happiest when I’m up in a tree.
Portrait of the bestest girl. Stella may be slowin Portrait of the bestest girl. Stella may be slowing down, but she’s still exceptionally curious. #dailystelladog #germanshepherd
Portrait of a woman who just wants a free moment t Portrait of a woman who just wants a free moment to paint over the poop brown bathroom walls that came with this house.
Working on a thing for a thing, but I ran out of d Working on a thing for a thing, but I ran out of daylight and dog patience. Back at it tomorrow. #authorsofinstagram
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